Times Passed

Once upon a time, I used to sing. Pretty well, If I remember well enough. I still think I'm not horrible, but times have definitely changed. I still love it. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't sing in my car, hum to the lyrics at work, or find a tune in my head out of nowhere that gets me going. Every year I had a solo in elementary school. In middle school, I took Orchestra because we could only take one music course. In high school, I went back to taking Choir and Orchestra. I was in Women's Choir, A Cappella Choir, and a special jazz group called 7th Heaven. I loved it. I eat, slept, and breathed music. It was all I knew and all I ever cared to know.

In high school, I was the crazy music kid in our graduating class. There were a few others, but I ended up being voted "Most likely to be the Next American Idol" and was runner up for "Most Musical" in my class. (Luckily, I lost out against one of my best friends for the top spot, an amazing cellist named Elizabeth. I hold no hostility. She's great.) But, now that I've all but abandoned playing my violin for reasons I'd rather not get into with this post, I find myself more and more drawn to written lyrics, to the curves of the lyricism in the notes, to the emotion in the orchestration. I find it now almost more than I used to when I was enamored with music and thought of nothing else. The feeling's still there, but buried underneath far too many other things.

Real life happened and now I find it harder and harder to get back to my musical roots. I've drifted so far from some of the things I love so much, it seems hard to go back given where I am now. I can't have people bringing down the things I love! The music that keeps me going, the tune that sings to my soul... The one thing that makes me feel alive and happy. No one will take that away from me.